Hands down, the most important thing in my life has been the amazing people in it.
They’ve lifted me up. They’ve encouraged me. They’ve given me support through the hard days, and given it to me straight when I needed to hear the truth, even though it hurt.
But they didn’t just show up in my life by chance.
I intentionally seek out amazing people, who live amazing lives. Because when we surround ourselves with amazing – well, that’s what we become.
I want to tell you how to build up an amazing tribe of women and men, who will keep you on track, encourage you, and fill your life with joy. It takes work, it takes positive vibes, and it takes good intention, but if you offer up positivity, you’ll get it back your way. So here are five ways to build up your tribe.
1. Be open to the people around you
So often, we go through life with our headphones in, eyes on our phones, stuck in our own little bubble. That way of living is absolutely contrary to being connected to the people in your life. Instead of being closed off and stuck in your own head, you need to be open to what the people around you have to offer.
Try turning off your phone for your next trip to the grocery store. Force yourself to make small talk with one stranger every day. Keep your headphones out during at least one direction of your commute. All of these things show a willingness to be open. And as our posture becomes more open, so does our ability to welcome more people into our life.
Being open to new people is vital to building your tribe. You never know who you might cross paths with who could change your life tomorrow…
2. Reach out to your current connections
Having a tribe is so much more than just having a lot of connections. It’s about depth of connection. It takes more than just reaching out to lots of different people to be supported. If it’s all surface level relationships, you’ll burn out.
So keep up connections with the people who are already around you. Take the time to really connect with the people in your community. It doesn’t have to be complicated. Sharing a cup of coffee or even just a Facebook message asking how someone has been can be enough to forge a deeper connection with someone. And as your connections grow deeper, the more you’ll be able to truly support each other.
So look for little ways to strengthen the connections you already have. Your next best friend could be the neighbor you make small talk with once or twice a week. You’ll never know though, unless you deepen that connection.
3. Listen
A great way to build connections is to really, truly see people for who they are. And the best way to do this is to be a good listener.
So often in our lives, we are asked to produce, give or deliver. But what if we took a deep breath, and just let ourselves be quiet and take in what the people around us have to say?
Being a good listener isn’t just about being quiet. It’s about really hearing what people have to say, asking good questions, and reading their postures and body language.
When we truly listen, we are able to see people’s hearts and ideas. And as we become more in tune with the thoughts and ideas of the people around us, we start to see the ways in which we can enrich the world around us. When we listen, we discover the ways in which we can bring greater health and beauty into our lives and the lives of those around us. And collaborating helps us deepen our connections and our community.
4. Act as a connector
One way to truly build your tribe is to be a connector.
There are so many ways to enrich the connections of the people around you, and a strong tribe is a connected one. Introduce your people to each other. Once they start to get to know each other, you’ll you have even more support than before, when you had several individuals supporting you separately.
Connect the people in your life to opportunities you think would enhance their lives. If your friend is trying to be more active, invite her to the amazing yoga studio you go to on Wednesdays. If your neighbor is telling you he’s having writer’s block, invite him to the writing group you go to at the library. By inviting people in and making connections for them, you strengthen the social fabric that supports you.
5. Be an encourager
Encouragement is magnetic.
People want to feel good about themselves. They want to feel appreciated for their hard work and best efforts. When you start to notice and applaud them for their beautiful accomplishments, they start to realize how important and strong they are. Recognizing strength in others is one of the most attractive traits a person can have.
See the good in people, and tell them about it. You’ll radiate positive vibes and attract the people you need into your life.
How are you going to build your tribe today? Let me know in the comments!